HOW TO HANDLE CHRONIC FEAR AND ANXIETY
What should you do when you encounter fear?
Here are a few suggestions…
Fear always brings out the fight or flight response.
This is the way our bodies have prepared for action which is a result of millions of years of evolution.
You develop fast reflexes, increased strength, pumping muscles and greater awareness.
It won’t work for you unless you use it and learn how to control it.
You learned how to allow fear by recognizing it, acknowledging it and making room for it in the previous blog post.
Once you allow it, you then need to…
Fear itself is completely harmless – it can only make you uncomfortable at worse, so let it in.
You might be saying to yourself I don’t like how it feels!
You don’t have to like it, but imagine….
There is a nasty and mean woman that lives nearby and you get an offer of $10 million to befriend her by her wealthy children.
She often has offensive outbursts and awful hygiene, you don’t actually like her, but the $10 million is attractive!
Are you going to befriend her for the money?
You most probably would.
What if you can use fear to reach your goals, live your values, perform at your highest potential, gain great self-confidence and live a life that is fulfilled and more meaningful?
HOW TO BE WELCOMING TO YOUR FEAR
Fear doesn’t want to “get you”.
Its purpose is to help you get through difficult situations.
It is alerting you of a potential threat or danger and to prepare your body for action.
You are really on the same team, so there is no need to fight it.
It is a support for you.
Say to yourself, “This is my brain letting me know of the danger. This is my body preparing to meet that danger.”
Fear is your teammate, not your enemy.
BE KIND TO YOUR FEAR
Let it come into your body by using your imagination and place your hand on the part of the body you feel it most strongly and simply “hold it” allowing it to feel the warm soothing effect of your hand.
Talk to it like it was one of your friends. “Hi fear, thanks for dropping by. Have a seat and make yourself comfortable.”
“So you dropped by to get my heart rate up and give my knees a workout? Are you going to add those butterfly feelings to my tummy?”
“Be my guest. Show me what you have in store for me today.”
You shouldn’t do this while performing or doing a test as it will distract you.
However, you can give it a try when you are in bed, at the dinner table or just sitting at your desk.
CHANNEL YOUR FEAR
So you let it in and made it your friend, what is the best way to use it?
Do you feel all the energy you are getting from it?
Do you feel all the adrenaline that is pumping throughout your body? You are ready for action – primed, amped, hyper and revved.
Now ask yourself, “How do I take advantage of this amazing energy? Where should I focus it?”
Remember to use your fear when playing sports or doing a performance.
You might not be able to channel it to an activity if you happen to be on a first date or on a plane, therefore, simply make some space for it and use it to be fully present.
WHAT ABOUT CONFIDENCE?
Suppose you are doing a new activity or something challenging like giving a speech.
You can act confident even if you don’t feel confident.
Why is that?
Real self-confidence doesn’t mean there is no fear.
Fear always comes up during challenging circumstances, irrespective of your level of confidence, however, you can use it to make you more energetic and improve your performance – you now have a different relationship with fear.
This will take some time to sink in but when it does you will see a big difference in your daily life.
You might start referring to it as “pumped” or “amped” as opposed to “fear” or “worry” or “anxiety”.
If you don’t have anything to focus your fear on, make a bit of room for it and fully focus on your activity.
GET HELP BEFRIENDING YOUR FEAR
Would you like to find out more about how to welcome fear and ways to channel it?
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